Today is a beautiful day. The sun is shinning outside and it is the perfect temperature. Maybe god is being nice to me since I do not have to work this weekend and he took it upon himself to make it sunny so that I would enjoy the sun. I have cleaned up my room just a little more so that it is not cluttered. I know I said that I should be outside enjoying the sun, but then I took into other considerations about other factors and um, decided not to go outside. Then the power went out. That was not fun. It was pure agony. I wonder if there will be anything about it in the news tonight.
Therefore, I did not do laundry and not a big surprise to anyone that knows me. I have looked over the dresses that I have (not many) and decide on what to take with me to Las Vegas and Ventura. On the other hand, should I go with a skirt and a blouse? I guess I will go with a skirt and blouse. I do not know why I even bother to dress up. Just to look nice for those couple of hours or ?
I suppose I am too hard on myself sometimes. I am not satisfied with the way I look (body wise) and wish I were taller. That is always going to be me. I wish I were taller. Back to looking better...maybe eat less and work out more. Workout by walking for an hour or some everyday, do some yoga, or abs workout. I will start it keep it up. That is what I say now but I know I will give up in a while. I just need motivation.
I think I need to do some soul searching. I thought I found myself while in England, but now that I am back, I feel I have lost myself again. What do I want to do with life? Where do I see myself in 5 years? Will I be married, single, divorced, or in a relationship? Not just those questions, but will I still be in school, graduated, trying for a masters, or dropped out and working at Mc Donald's for minimum wage? Maybe I should just drop everything, go to Europe travel, and do odd jobs to get by and then see if I am still finding whom I am. Oh god will someone help me?
