1-31 last day of the month...

Tomorrow will be grueling and overtime might be necessary. I'm reminded of how I file wrong when it's not my fault. The first time of the day was when I filed an unpaid invoice. How am I suppose to know? I'm so busy filing stuff I don't notice. I have so much to file that it's not even funny. The pile is at least or almost a foot thick. The sad thing is that most of it is one sheet to one place.

I sorted all of the filing into cabinets. There are some that I couldn't find so I just left it alone. I have so much filing that it's not going to get done. I'm only the semi-help to the A/R department. If I was to get the full time job I don't know what I'd do. If that meant no filing I'd be happy. Better do some homework or I won't have time later this week.

Horoscope: You've reached a rough patch in the road. It'll be over before you know it.
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1-30 work on a Sunday...

I didn't get enough sleep. I then worked on work stuff that only took me 15 minutes, but if I was at work it would take me a whole lot longer.

I wish that I had a longer weekend because I know what this week will be like. To face all that filing and with no help and that the pile can grow some more. I'll put my best to file it away.

Horoscope: Head a challenge to your authority off at the pass. Let them know who's boss.
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It's good to watch late night TV...

It is good. But bad overall since during the weekend I'm not rested and then I'll be worn out on Monday. How illogical is that? Yes a short and easy to read entry.

Horoscope: Your confidence could use a boost. Tell the naysayers to get lost, already.
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Reflections - Mulan

Look at me
I will never pass for
a perfect bride
Or a perfect daughter
Can it be
I'm not meant to play
this part?
Now I see
that if I were truly
to be myself
I would break my
family's heart

Who is that girl I see
staring straight
back at me?
Why is my reflection someone
I don't know?
Somehow I cannot hide
Who I am
Though I've tried
When will my reflection show
who I am inside?
When will my reflection show
who I am inside?

I left work so fast that I thought I'd
Horoscope: You can avoid a heap of trouble if you clean your desk space now.
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More over time...

I thought I'd have most of my filing done, but I don't. The office manager did help me file a few things, but that was all. I mean I know she's swamped with things to do, but I'm more swamped. I'm doing two jobs at once and five things at once. Heck I even took home work stuff to do at home. That's sad after 1.5 hours of over time.

Then when I get home from dinner I find a letter and then find out I owe money to an apartment complex? What?! I don't owe them a dime and I'm going to fight it. Good thing I work for a property management company.

I'm so tired and it's only 10.00 p.m. I hope something good happens in the next week. Working so much is hurting me.

Horoscope: Good news will get around. You don't have to issue a press release.
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Early out of work, but late out of class...

Man I can't believe that class ended so late. No one said anything and told the teacher that it was time to go. I thought that Mr. Drain would say something. People just kept asking questions. I just wish someone would just say teacher it's late can we leave? No one said anything. I don't think anyone wants to be known as the "break" person and or the "leave" person. Tomorrow is another long day ahead.

Horoscope: Today you feel a conflict with your sense of duty (and what's right and proper) and your sense of being friendly to others. You won't cut corners. (Even dark chocolate is sinful.) This is no fun. A hair-shirt mentality is the theme of your day. (Bread and water, anyone?)
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Over time again...

I'm so busy at work now. It doesn't help when Tanya comes in either. It makes it more crazy and longer. Shorter lunches and more stress. She came in and all hell broke loose. She wouldn't' stop about this and or that. She speaks so fast you have to go what? Or take a little time to digest everything that she says. It's getting to be a little bit crazy at work. I think I might be taking on too much.

Horoscope: Your options have suddenly been diminished. At least it's easier to make a choice.
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Yikes!

I continued where I left off yesterday. I felt swamped and useless because I couldn't get all of my duties done. To top it off I got called for filing something wrong. If she (office manager) didn't notice I was taking phone calls and then had to help with the statements. It's not like I was sitting on my lovely rear doing nothing.

I had to do something new at work. Well that was yesterday, but today as well too. I had to make a notice and send it out for a NSF (Not Sufficient Funds) check. Then I had to go over some of the problems that we have and it's not like they're not getting done, but it takes a lot of time.

I did tell the boss there needs to be an assistant for the account receivables. No reaction. I'm so swamped with stuff that I couldn't even file correctly. How is it that I get told that I filed it wrong when I'm trying to do a few things at once? Would they rather it just build up and not get done? I need to get out of the office and stop tripping out. I think I like the fact that I can have milk tea in the office or at home if I wake up early enough. Breakfast is a must to keep my brain working, but when I get home dinner is also a must too.

Quote of the day: "Climb high, climb far, your goal the sky, your arm, the stars." - Unknown
Horoscope: There's something you're not getting here. Go back and read the fine print again.
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AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

That's me screaming and also for the office being CHEAP! I get added more duties and I can't get a simple $3,000.00 raise? What's up with that? I am serious if they even meet me half way with that amount I'd be happy. It's telling me please leave this job and don't

The strangest thing was when the property manager said my hair looked cute down..hmm...

Anyway at work it was crazy. I had to sort through a ton of things. I'm still not done and I couldn't even really file things. I just gave up at one point. I knew that I'd get to it eventually, but some I just hid. I know that's not the greatest thing in the world. I want to prove that I can do a lot, but now I've just got too much to do.

Tomorrow is another day and I want to meet my goal of getting stuff done. I have a feeling I'll be the next person in the office to leave if I keep getting all this extra stuff to do.

Horoscope: This wasn't the reaction you were expecting. Better not take it personally.
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What did I do today?

I woke up and didn't want to, but was forced to in a way. Then I had some cereal for lunch. Yes, I'm truly lazy. I was able to give some good advice to someone heading overseas. I'm so glad that I could help in the small way that I can.

It was then time to copy my textbook. It was quick and painless. I even got my workbook done too so I'm stoked! I couldn't do it at my workplace because there's just too many people. A few pages OK, but a whole book? Never. I had to take out stitches that I've knitted and redo it, It wasn't too bad and at least I got it done. Yay!

Time to relearn Chinese words and time to do some homework or research on words learned. Tomorrow I demand higher pay!

Horoscope: These days, your speed is less important than your ability to change direction.
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Heaven By Your Side - A1

You and I, cannot hide
The love we feel inside
The words we need to say

I feel that I
Have always walked alone
But now that you're here with me
There'll always be a place that I can go

Suddenly our destiny
Has started to unfold

When you're next to me
I can see the greatest story
Love has ever told

Now my life is blessed with
The love of an angel

How can it be true?

Somebody to keep the dream alive

The dream I found in you

I always thought that love would be
The strangest thing to me

But when we touch, I realise
That I found my place in heaven by your side

I could fly, when you smile
I'd walk a thousand miles to hear you
Call my name
Now that I have finally found the
one who will be there for me eternally
My everlasting sun

Suddenly our destiny has started
to unfold

When you're next to me I can
See the greatest story love has ever
told

Now my life is blessed with
The love of an angel

How can it be true?

Somebody to keep the dream alive

The dream I found in you

I always thought that love would be
The strangest thing to me

But when we touch, I realise that I
Found my place in heaven by your side
That I found my place in heaven by
your side

Heaven by your side, heaven by
your side, heaven by your side

When you're next to me, I can see
The greatest story love has ever told

Now my life is blessed with
The love of an angel

How can it be true?

Somebody to keep the dream alive

The dream I found in you

I always thought that love would be
The strangest thing to me

But when we touch, I realise that I
Found my place in heaven by your side

Now my life is blessed with
The love of an angel

Heaven by your side

Somebody to keep the dream alive

The dream I found in you

I always thought that love would be
The strangest thing to me

But when we touch, I realise that I
Found my place in heaven by your side

Well rested...

If I had a choice I wouldn't have woken up. I would have slept until the afternoon. I know that sounds crazy, but it's true. I'm always tired when I have to wake up for work. I think it's the activity that I do in the office that wears me out.

I'm truly bitter about the amount I'm getting. I know I get benefits and all, but there's only one of me to cover the grounds of the whole office to help out everyone that needs help. Not fair for me and the amount I'm paid. Monday morning I'm going to talk to the office manager about this. Well that and with the list of stuff that I do.

Horoscope: Rise to the occasion, not the bait. Stay out of the fray. They'll respect you for it.
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Pure torture...

There weren't that many phone calls today, but I had to check two. I helped out and I think the new system that we came up with is pretty good. I think it'll be the way we send out statements from now on. I had so much to do and then when I thought about the office manager asking me to help with some filing, I said I had other stuff to do and don't know if I'll even get to it.

After thinking long and hard about how much I'm getting paid and all of the duties that I have compared to the part-timer and the receptionist I have more to do. I am definitely going to have to ask for more. After making a list of how much work I do I think I should be paid more or equal to someone in the front of the office.

The list I've made isn't supported with reason, but if they want an essay with reason I can give one to them. I just don't think it's fair with a $2.50 increase in pay I have to do more than I should with the stuff I already do.

Horoscope: This picture looks beautiful at a distance. Up close, it's another story.
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First day of school...

Work was a total shock. I find out that I have to take phone calls and instead of sitting my rear down to answer calls I instructed them to send to voice mail. I did find out the new person's name. Word travels slow in the office. Then I find out I'm only getting a $2.50 pay raise. You can see and sense how happy I'm feeling. The fact they created a position for me doesn't seem right. They should have had this to begin with.

Then after work I rush home to get some food and I failed to do so. I arrived in class and thought where should I sit? I sat by the window to keep me awake and to look at the clock. I know that sounds silly, but I always want class to end. All of the feeling about tests and exams made me feel uneasy. Then when I found out I had to do lab time, I wasn't pleased.

When the teacher passed out the words that we would be tested on I got nervous. I went I know this, this, what's this? But I asked her if this would be the right class for me. She said yes. Then while we were going over the vocabulary everyone had to huddle next to someone to look onto the book. Thankfully, the person next to me was nice and asked if I wanted to look on. That was nice of him.

That made me feel better and the fact that I can understand the teacher with a little practice is a good thing.

Horoscope: Be prepared for a monumental clash of egos. Hold your ground as long as you can.
Reading: The Da Vinci Code
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So the truth is revealed...

I arrive at work and wonder what's going on. There's someone new taking the place of the receptionist. Then it clicks because someone needed phone number for the temp agency. The person who did the work orders decided to leave. I guess she couldn't take the environment anymore. I don't know.

I am making more work for myself then I should. I'm doing more than I should or just taking on too much. I swear I'm more forgetful than all the rest of them. So much to do and so little time and yet for very little pay. I think that sums up everything.

Tomorrow I go back to school. How scary is that? I hope it ends early, but I doubt it. I hope it'll be fun and I'll make some new friends. I also know at least one person reads this so I know I'm not writing this just for kicks. Thanks Jon!

Horoscope: The ground is shifting. You wanted change, but be careful what you wish for. - That is true since one of the people at work quit. Too bad I can't move up the chain.
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Hello?

The fax number is 221-2 um, 95 something. Yes, I accidentally gave the regular phone number as the fax number, but luckily I caught it in time. I just wasn't awake. I mean I knew I had to get out of bed, but my brain just didn't function. Then doing some regular filing I left filing inside the cabinet without putting it away. Bad, just terrible.

While trying to get information from one of our former vendors we ran across one who thought this was a funny message: "Hi you've reached me. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you." Yes, they really said you've reached me. Who the hell is me? Plus we had to find out where this person was located. I traced it to being a cell phone that is on the AT&T network. Scary stuff when I'm on psycho mode. OK that's the thing that woke me up and made me become a live.

I also spent about 15 minutes on the phone trying to change the voice mail personsal greeting. Really I can't work it even with the instruction book. Quite sad if you ask me. There's always tomorrow.

After doing that I was sentenced to the "attic". I was there for a good hour or something until my back couldn't take it anymore and I had to feed myself. My stomach was hungry for food and I needed a break. In reality I didn't take lunch until 3.18 p.m. When I finally had lunch I had about less than an hour until the work day was done.

I was the topic about being small and fitting into small spaces, but it wasn't as bad as the one said about the property manager. One of the vendors said that one of the property managers looked like he was in his second trimester. That was just hilarious. Thank god it wasn't me. The property manager was OK about it, but then again I don't think he heard it. And that was my work day.

Horoscope: You know exactly what a friend's going through. Make yourself available.
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Jon!

I woke up this morning thinking that nothing special would happen. Knitting and watching TV were already on the list and anything else that happened would be extra special. I really didn't know that I would get to talk to a friend that I haven't spoken with for at least a year or even more. It was pure luck really that I would get to speak with a friend that I've known since '96. Yes, that's a long time and I'm glad to still have this friend.

His name is Jon. I met him online through a friend. He was my math tutor for a little while online and then we just lost track of one another. We do have the talker to meet up, but I never did get to meet him when I went over in 2003. I hope he can come over sometime in the next couple of years when I have a car. I'd surely go to meet him then. He'll be older and I'll be older, but still the same goofy girl he knew back when I was in high school and when he was at Oxford. Yes, he's a math whiz too.

Thanks Jon. You've been great and I'm glad I got to speak with you today. Something good did come out of today's day off. I knitted a lot and got to talk to two good friends Jon and Allan. Life couldn't get any better than this.

Horoscope: Even the biggest waves won't drag you under if you know how to swim.
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Kiss Kiss Puppies!

I've found my birthday present! I saw it in the newspaper. I'm so proud of me. Too bad there's not a lot on eBay otherwise I'd buy it. The price for the one pair they have on eBay is extortion. If I bought the item with three cards I'd still be saving more money than if I bought it online. Maybe I should wait for it to be more popular on eBay, but then again I want it now. I'm terrible. I can't seem to grow up. Stuff animals are my weakness. Yikes!

I woke up this afternoon without thinking about anything. I knew I went to bed late last night and that's why I probably woke up with a headache. There wasn't anything that didn't cure it except with a cup of milk tea. Milk tea or anything with caffeine did cure it. Then I just started to knit again while watching TV. I had no idea there was a new Simpsons tonight, but I watched it. I'm thinking that my knitting has taken a turn into obsession or a slight one. I want to get it done and then start another one. The one I'm working on now is really wide and I've done a lot since I started it on Friday. No mistakes so far and no need to undo and redo.

Horoscope: You'll have to live with a recent purchase. Make a better decision next time.
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Happy Birthday...

I woke up early today thinking I could sleep until 2.00 p.m. at least, but I couldn't. I started to get tired about 2 something. I already went to bed early for a Friday night. What more could I ask for?

I had no idea I'd end up cooking dinner and I'll be damned if I'm going to wash the dishes. I guess my birthday this year ranks up there with my brother. I did get into an argument over a hands-free headset. My dad claims he doesn't have one when in reality he doesn't remember where he put his. Then he asks me for mine. Luckily I have an extra one.

So this is my birthday. Sitting at home knitting and watching TV. How exciting right? The only good thing I think happened was Michelle Kwan winning her 9th Nationals title. She also has the most 6.0s for a lady. The person in second is Brian Boitano. Go Michelle and kick butt at Worlds.

Horoscope: You're better off in a crowd today. Come to decisions through consensus.
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Martin Luther King Jr.

Today is his birthday. We should remember him and his famous speech of, "I have a dream".

Here's his speech:

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of captivity. But one hundred years later, we must face the tragic fact that the Negro is still not free.

One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land.

So we have come here today to dramatize an appalling condition. In a sense we have come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir.

This note was a promise that all men would be guaranteed the inalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check which has come back marked "insufficient funds." But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation.

So we have come to cash this check -- a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to open the doors of opportunity to all of God's children. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood.

It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment and to underestimate the determination of the Negro. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. There will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights.

The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges. But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. we must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force.

The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny and their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom.

We cannot walk alone. And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, "When will you be satisfied?" we can never be satisfied as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair. I say to you today, my friends, that in spite of the difficulties and frustrations of the moment, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal." I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slaveowners will be able to sit down together at a table of brotherhood. I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a desert state, sweltering with the heat of injustice and oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice. I have a dream that my four children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day the state of Alabama, whose governor's lips are presently dripping with the words of interposition and nullification, will be transformed into a situation where little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls and walk together as sisters and brothers. I have a dream today. I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together. This is our hope. This is the faith with which I return to the South. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with a new meaning, "My country, 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim's pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring." And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania! Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado! Let freedom ring from the curvaceous peaks of California! But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia! Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee! Let freedom ring from every hill and every molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

When we let freedom ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

Quote: "Flowers are teh sweetest things God ever made and forgot to put a soul into." - Henry Ward Beecher
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Birthday eve...

This morning I woke up to a new morning show and not one that was recorded. Too bad I went back to sleep until 8.00 a.m. I had to hurry up and get dressed and leave the house. I had no idea where my wallet was, but had a good idea that it was at work. Yes, I didn't know I left my wallet at work until I looked for it in the morning. I arrived at work just in the nick of time, but it seemed like I was a little late. I wish they would cut me some slack since I'm old. The weather in the morning was cold and motivated me to walk faster to work.

I didn't get the salary that I wanted nor could I negotiate it. Mean while the part time person is just complaining a ton about how much she makes and how much she doesn't make. She feels it should be the company that asks her to stay and give her benefits and a raise. I think she should talk to the company to let them realize that they're going to lose someone who is valuable. I don't think that she knows that I'm going to work full time there. She feels like she'd be trapped there if she doesn't try to find a better job. She thinks she can get a job for $15.00 an hour. Realistically she cold only make about $13.00 maximum an hour.

I don't even think at this time I can get a job that pays $15.00 an hour. I'm just waiting for a call saying that I can get paid a nice $18.00 an hour just washing dishes in a laboratory. Priti is crazy. She had a cow over some tags and claimed they were hers. Who died and made her the boss? She socializes and thinks that everyone revolves around her. Crazy.

Horoscope: Everyone has their eyes on you. Watch out for banana peels in your path.
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Work was a drag...

If there's something that I don't like it's rechecking stuff that should have been checked. I mean there's no way that someone can be that lazy can they? I hate the word "projects" now. After this one and the other from over time I'm just not liking it.

I got an early birthday present. Yes, I'm getting old and I don't want to admit it either. I got a dog! Not a real one, but it's cute. I'll have the picture up soon just like the ones from Hong Kong. I'll do it soon, but with school starting up soon, I don't think I'll have time unless I work on it on my laptop in class. Shame on me right?

Tomorrow my goal is to talk about my salary. I need one before I turn 24!

Here's the present:Horoscope: The truth is more complex than you anticipated. Be open to nuance.
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On The Way Down - Ryan Cabrera

Sick and Tired of this world
There's no more air
Trippin' over myself
Goin' nowhere
Waiting
Suffocating
No direction
And I took a dive

And on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
Almost fell right through
But I held onto you

I've been wondering why
It's only me
Have you always been inside
Waiting to breathe
It's alright
Sunlight
On my face
I wake up and yeah, I'm alive

'cause on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
Almost fell right through
But I held onto you

I was so afraid
Of going under
But now
The weight of the world
Feels like nothing, no, nothing

Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
Down, down, down
You're all I needed
Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
You're all I needed

And I won't forget the way you loved me

All that I wanted
All that I needed

On the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
On the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you

Down, down, down
But I held onto you
Down, down, down
But I held onto you

Am I taking on too much?

I don't know what I got myself into when I started looking over leases. I mean sure it's good to know the information that they have and it's good to be on the computer, but it takes ages. I also had to play semi receptionist. That wasn't too bad, but the phones aren't for me.

I still don't have a salary. There are so many things to be done in the office it's not even funny. They need more people to help out. I'm one person who's helping out the whole office. That's just crazy. One me with one pair of hands and a pair of feet and one brain and half of one sometimes when I'm not awake.

I'm still thinking about this mini bus or coach that I saw that said First Bus. It reminded me of England. I'm missing there and the weather if there's snow. I don't miss the cold that's for sure. I wish I was going back. I need to take some time off and head over there. It'll be forever until I can get time off.

Last night while I was knitting on the same scarf since last week, I noticed that there was something wrong and I pulled it all off and then got most of it done I think. I think I redid about 1/3 of it.

Horoscope: A colleague's assistance is less than helpful. You might have to tackle this alone.
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Terrible Tuesday...

It started off OK since I had to file stuff and the rest I just boxed up. Crazy stuff sometimes. Thank god the office was quiet for a couple of hours. I had no idea what was to be in store later on. I had a quick session with the boss in terms of folders that had to be made and then it was back to whatever I was doing. After lunch I
would be busy like crazy.

Why me? That's the first thing that comes to mind at work. I had to call people up to ask for their time sheet. Two people were difficult and the rest weren't home so that was OK. I started off with a long message and then afterwards I just shorten everything. I had to take breaks because I just couldn't deal with calling people.

I still had filing to do that I didn't get done and I was ready to go home at 4.30 p.m. I couldn't be in that office any longer. I was just really going stir crazy. I still don't have a salary and no dental insurance. I'm going to take advantage of my sick days once I'm hired for good.

Gotta sleep I'm so tired.

Horoscope: It's good to know what you like. Still, there are other options. Don't rule them out.
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The countdown...

I'm counting down the days until I get a nice three day weekend. There are four more days left. Today was crazy. I have no idea how this week will be, but I want it to be the weekend already! Baseball season please come soon!

Horoscope: This quarrel has reached an impasse. Back off for a while. Both of you.
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Lots of sleep...

Doesn't the title seem like deja vu? Well I did get a lot of sleep. I didn't wake up until the afternoon which was nice. Of course, I didn't sleep until almost 3.00 a.m. I'm still working on my scarf. My new scarf is about a day or two away from being done. It just depends on how much time I spend on it. Weekdays I'll have less time and weekends I'll have more time to work on it. So the weekends I'll get done faster. I wonder how many I can make before Chinese New Year.

Once I'm done with this new scarf it's off to make another one. I'm going to give a wider one another shot. I sort of cheated with thicker needles I guess and so it's not really a scarf. The one I'm making now for myself is similar to the one I already made. I know how boring am I just sitting at home knitting and watching TV? I must be a grandmother or something. Someone actually called me that which was sad.

Quote of the day: "I look upon the pleasure which we take in a garden as one of the most innocent delights in human life." - Cicero
Horoscope: This issue isn't yours to decide. The best thing you can offer is a listening ear.
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Thanks Allan!

I know he'll never read this, but I want to thank him in reminding me about myself. To quote part of Britney Spears song, "Stronger than yesterday, now its nothin' but my way". I forgot how bad it was when I was in school. I forgot how someone helped me through those times.

If I just believed in myself then I would know that the person at work wouldn't have made me crack. Sometimes it just takes one thing to make you realize and remember where you were and how far it took you to get to where you are today. If Allan hadn't been there I don't know what or where I'd be now.

I was still angry that I had been told off when I went to work on Friday. The only thoughts running through my head were how to get even. If she told the boss that she did all of the work I would be extremely angry.

Allan taught me a lot about myself. I'm still looking to find myself. I thought I did when I got this job, but now I'm not so sure. When Allan said he was trying to find himself after graduating I think I had the same problem. When I got the job I thought great something to do, but now I wonder if I should pursue what I wanted to while in school? Will going back to school help me?

Quote of the day: "Flowers are our greatest silent friends." - Jim G. Brown
Horoscope: You may not feel prepared for this challenge. But it's ready for you.
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Still angry...

I was still angry when I woke up this morning. I didn't think about not going to work, but I did have ignore on my mind. I really wasn't pleased that I was the one who was "scolded" by the office manager. I mean how could that be? I already did my best and that's what matters. I'm starting to sound a lot like William Hung.

The accountants came on over to do the taxes and I did the best that I could to help them out. Not enough, but I was at lunch when they came. I'm partly eating and partly helping them out with the most that I could. I've been in the office long enough, but not quite sure where everything is. I mean I could help with so much only because I knew where some things were. If I could have helped them in anyway I could I would have.

Even after the work day was ended and I had to take the bus home I was still fuming. I thought it wasn't fair that I got in trouble while the other person didn't get any trouble. OK I did find out that the boss wanted her to have this done on Wednesday, but she didn't do it and she got chewed out. It's not my fault and I don't know why she would take it out on me. She has her own personal assistant. I'm everyone's assistant. I have it the hardest in the office where as everyone else has it pretty darn easy. Oh well at least the weekend is upon me and I have knitting and TV that will take my mind off of this.

Horoscope: The road in front of you is dark and winding. Better turn your headlights on.
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Pissed off at work!

The day started out fine. I woke up late (past 8.00 a.m.) but that was OK. I just got dressed and took some food for later. It was just getting up and getting changed to be out the door that I worried about. I arrived at work to find a large pile of filing to be done. I file everything and then work on other stuff. Things were OK when I went to lunch and then after lunch. It was just when it was about two hours before I had to get off work that the fireworks started.

I had to file stuff and when I went to check the file box I saw the stamp that was especially made for me to make it easier for me to file. They label stuff wrong and then when I filed it I'm told I filed it wrong. Hmm, let me examine this first:

They have a stamp made so it helps me file easier and they put the wrong information on it. I file it into the wrong folder and I get blamed for it? WOW. Did I abuse the stamp usage? Nope. Did other abuse the usage of it? YES. Were they informed?! Nope. Was it explained how to use? No.

Let's now examine who's fault this is:
The boss decided to have a stamp made. OK so far. The stamp has places for you to check and to fill in. Still no problem. There is one space for you to initial. Problem. No one initials their initials. Here is a problem. I can point fingers and say well this looks like so and so's writing. IF you use the stamp use it correctly.

Next problem:
One of the higher ups said to have me help out since they were busy. OK granted I am too filing and had to find stuff that I had filed wrong with no fault of my own, but I could make time to help out. I was asked if Wayne asked me for my help or told me what to do. I said no. I didn't get Wayne into trouble because it was the truth. I get told that he needs my help so I go, but I see that he's still working on stuff. I said let me know when you're ready. I wasn't talking to Priti at all. I was talking to Wayne. Then Priti goes and tattletales on me. She said I gave her attitude. Well excuse me, but I was told that Wayne needed help. Is she Wayne? When did get a sex change? When did she change her name to Wayne?

Then Landa comes and tells me that I gave her "attitude". I didn't even say that to her. I said that to Wayne. Landa then says that I need to go help. So I stand there for a good 2 minutes. 2 minutes I'll never see again. 2 minutes I could have spent finished filing. Then I finish finding out information that wasn't even part of my job and she's the stupid one now. She never bothered to check the files to find out what she has to pay and what she doesn't.

This was AFTER she told me thanks for cleaning her desk. I mean what the hell was that then?! The whole you gave attitude to Priti thing then?? Man...

If given the chance I would rat on her to take her place. Being so damn mean to me. Just because I don't help her out doesn't mean she can't ask for my help. Sure I help out everyone, but damn if you're going to be a forgetful person and lose pens all the time and not even bother closing the drawer you get pens out of then screw you.

Then after I finished filing I stamped the checks. I was stamping loudly letting it be known I was pissed and upset. Then Karen goes is it broken or are you going to break it? I say it's already broken and that's why I have to stamp it so hard. I also said two wrongs make a right. Like negative times a negative equals a positive. It's true in math so why can't it be true in life? It's a screwed up stamp that doesn't work right so why not just abuse it? Not like a new one will be made anyway. I should order them so that we have them. But I doubt that I could.

I was so upset that I started to cry when I left work. Me being tattletaled on by someone older than me. So you don't like my attitude so you tell the office manager? Fine have me fired then when the office is a mess who's going take care of it? If I was to leave tomorrow they'd be going backwards once again. If I get a chance to talk to the boss I'll have him chew her out. Screw you because if you get me mad I'll just ignore your ass and leave you hanging and when you don't get your stuff done don't come to me for help. I'll just be a total bitch to you like you were to me.

Horoscope: You don't have to stick to the script. Drive off the road if it gets you there faster. - Yeah if someone wasn't named Priti. She should be named Ugly because of her attitude. Or hella lazy and a fat ass. She walked like a freaking cowboy. She has rickets. There I said it.
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I hate boxes...

Honestly, how can an office be so small? There are boxes everywhere. I know it sounds crazy, but there are. What I really need are keys to the office to work later. I hate people who need stuff and I have to pull it out. Then put it back. Then I get a complaints about it being too tight together. Well I asked if she wanted to pack or was that someone else? Aaron actually gave me praise and said I was the best person they've had so far. Interesting really and I wonder if it was his sickness that was talking.

I got the shipment of stuff and really had no idea where it should be put so we put it into someone's office. I know how original right? The office should have a better design. The one that is has now isn't ideal. Let's see what else did I do? I made it known that I was a Giants fan to my boss. Good for me. Everyone is against the boss and I'm against the person who's somewhat in charge. Why do I have to be stuck in the middle. I'm trying to get the office to loosen up and also to get it organized. It needs to be. I should really start with Aaron's office, but his would take weeks. The funniest thing is that the office manager left a note on one of the papers I had to file and told one of the property managers that the stamp is what would make my filing easier. He told the office manager it's a great tool and that he would use it. So far it's been working out pretty well, but then again it's still in testing stages and it's only the first week of the year.

I can read it better, but sometimes people still don't use it correctly. Sometimes I still have to find out where it belongs. I really have to change the places of where things go. The office needs me in there for a weekend. Just a weekend or a month and everyone will like it. Ideally it would be love, but oh well you take what you can get.

Quote of the day: "More than anything, I must have flowers, always, always." - Claude Monet
Horoscope: A picture-perfect life is absolutely unrealistic. Adjust your expectations. - Ain't that the truth?
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The Tonight Show with Jay Leno

I just watched a segment with John Melendez who went to talk with second graders. It was funny. He asked two girls whos' boy friend was cuter and they both agreed on one and didn't say each of their boyfriends were cute. Then the boy who wouldn't turn to face the girl he was kind of sitting next to say a simple hello and when John moved his chair he quickly turned the other way. How funny it was. Off to bed now for real.

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More work for me...

Now that I'm somewhat becoming full time and salaried I've got more to do in the office than ever. I'm making changes in the office that are GOOD. I mean really without me they're nothing. I don't need them, but they need me. I know I shouldn't say that, but I'll have the best revenge for a friend. If I clean up the office and make it perfect and if I were to leave and have my brother take over the sweetest revenge.

Before I left I made a list of things for me to do tomorrow. I know it sounds crazy, but I'll forget! I'll see filing and file and then forget what else I have to do. My horoscope for yesterday was so true. I am organized and it's good for an office, but I need a better title than file clerk. I do more than file. I'm the personal assistant to everyone in the office. OK just the lazy people. I placed and order and hope that the price and what not is exactly what I thought out. Time for bed and I won't want to get up in the morning.

Horoscope: Sometimes you have to go to your garden and, if necessary, clear away the weeds.
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First day of work during the new year...

I spent it doing almost anything. Actually I don't know what I did. I finished filing stuff I had left over from last year. I can honestly say last year. Heh. I was going to pack up the items that we didn't need anymore, but I didn't get the chance. Instead, I ended up filing stuff. I had a couple of things to do before leaving work, but I just had to leave it for tomorrow. Not enough time. I just hope I remember tomorrow.

I just thought that I'd have to make a list of things to do. If I don't I'll forget. This I'll just have to remember tomorrow. I guess I'm starting to have a real job this time. I've somewhat passed the three month trial period. I did get paperwork for insurance! Whoo hoo! Tomorrow is another day.

Horoscope: Your organizational system needs a revamp. Time to clear away the junk.
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Second of the day of the year...

I'm at home. It was just cold and depressing. Just killing time until it's time for bed and then back to work for the new year. Bleh. When I think about how much time I actually had for time off from work in terms of holidays it wasn't a lot. Just wish that the time was more. Hopefully, something better will happen. No new year's resolution yet.

Horoscope: Your eccentricities are cute. But you might want to consider your audience.
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Happy New Year!

If you would believe it the first things I did during the new year was try and figure out how to pay my Kaiser bill. Hard to believe, but the TV was on Jay Leno and as the countdown began that's what I was doing. How exciting right?

Today I didn't really do anything. I just stayed home and watched TV. Catching up on TV is good.

Horoscope: Sure, it takes a whole team to win. But that doesn't mean you can't be the leader.
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